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Writer's pictureEmily Roberts

How to Advocate for Yourself as a Chronic People Pleaser in Business?

Updated: Jun 1, 2023

When I started my own business, it was all about juggling projects - both for clients and myself. As passionate as I was to acquire new customers and offer them the best service possible, I found that this goal often put my own growth in second priority. That is, until I realized putting energy into self-improvement could actually benefit me on a much bigger scale than focusing solely on others' objectives ever would. On this journey of mine, here's what I learned: when you start investing in your own expansion first, then everyone associated with you wins big time.


For far too long, many people pleasing entrepreneurs neglect understanding that there are more than just "yes" and "no" decisions, and actually a third option when faced with tough choices: “maybe”. So perhaps this blog post will encourage more effective decision-making within your own business by teaching you how you can think outside of traditional boxes and come up with creative solutions tailored specifically for you. Here are a few of my favorite ways to navigate that “yes”,”no”, and “maybe” for us avid people pleasers with an obligatory tendency.



“Hi, thank you for thinking of me, but I am unfortunately unavailable for this project. Here are a few recommendations of others that I think could be a great fit” -

For whatever reason you aren’t able to take on the project or client, this response can smooth things over without being a dead end. There are obviously reasons that person wanted to work with you, whether it is personal connection, your style of work, or referral! And the worst thing you can do is to devalue that respect they are giving you!


“Let me think about it, and I’ll get back with you” -

Even if you know 100% what your answer is, this is a great way to help the other party feel values, and that you are putting thought and effort. Many times running into a rash decision when you feel pressured can lead to regret later down the road.


“I enjoy working with you, but this isn’t in my scope of work, here are a few recommendations that I think could be a great fit” -

Now this one is for my freelancers out there (Virtual assistants, Social Media Managers, etc.). Not saying that every client will be like this, but, what I AM saying is that you will 100% run into this dilemma. And that is, a client will sometimes try to push you out of your scope of work that was agreed upon. This happens for a number of reasons, here’s a couple:

#1 - They are new to working with freelancers and do not quite understand the boundaries.

#2 - They are taking advantage of you - maybe they are requesting specialty skills and the rate you are charging does not accommodate that.

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Here’s my best tips to advocate for yourself in a professional setting:


  • Set boundaries. You will be surprised what protecting your time and mental health will do for your business. Not only will you be able to focus on the exact things you want, but you will have more time to be present in your personal life. It’s a rat race out there when you are trying to be the one stop shop for every single person. The quicker you come to that realization, is the moment you take control back of your life.

  • Stop saying “I’m sorry”. ALL. OF. THE. TIME. Read that one again. You don’t have to be sorry for everything, especially for things that are entirely out of your control.

  • Know what you bring to the table, and stand in that confidence. It’s okay to be proud of your work and the value you have.


Ultimately, we all have the capacity to make healthy and empowering decisions for ourselves, even when we want to please other people. With a bit of practice and self-reflection, and becoming aware of our wants and needs (trust me, I am still a work in progress!). Remember, you were put on this earth with your own unique set of skills, talents and abilities - don't underestimate yourself! Prioritize yourself first. Take it one step at a time, be patient with your progress and try your best not to give up. With that said, I hope the suggestions I shared gave you some insight into the power of being an advocate for yourself.

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